Exploring Ljubljana with Abandon and Audacity: Reflections on a Solo Trip
Key Highlights :
The city of Ljubljana in Slovenia is a unique destination – not only is it close to Italy, but it is also a place that offers a sense of solitude and reflection. I recently had the opportunity to visit this beautiful city on a solo trip and it was an experience that I will never forget.
I had been invited to Ljubljana eight months prior by Suzana Milevska, a curator who was my peer at the Künstlerhaus Büchsenhausen fellowship in Innsbruck. She was curating an exhibition in the Slovenian capital and was co-organising a parallel one-day seminar at which she hoped I would speak. I eagerly said yes, and my partner was able to take time off as well, so we planned a five-hour road trip from Innsbruck, with two brief stops for sandwiches and coffee. We mainly vibed to Punjabi beats, and our toddler was cooperative, so we arrived feeling quite chuffed with ourselves.
The purpose of the gathering felt urgent. It was to understand the relevance of notions of apology, conciliation, and what it may mean to make amends, and to study examples of how this had unfolded in various parts of the world. I was astonished at the quality of the discourse and the clarity of all the speakers’ stand in relation to the ongoing genocide in Palestine. Though I had to miss the second session, I felt quite humbled by the earnestness of each of the presentations which examined a wide range of subjects.
I had a consciousness of what it would have been like if I had been child-free. I would have had more time, energy and attention span to network and make connections. I would have also experienced the city differently. I did have about 40 minutes on our second day when our child was asleep with my partner. I had extended his nap and knew he could now manage without me. I got dressed, told my partner I was heading out, and I walked along the river Ljubljanica alone, taking in the romantic setting. The famous ‘triple bridge’ was a climactic point where I suddenly experienced the force of the river, its tide and its gushing soundtrack. It was beginning to clear after a rainy morning and there was the scent of roasting chestnuts pervading the air. I windowshopped a bit and even visited two thrift shops. Nothing called out to me, but I savoured the experience of being alone in a new city.
I made my presentation standing, because my ass was still reeling from the impact of sitting continuously for five hours. Once I began, I could already feel the stress leave my body because I found, in the audience, so many eager and attentive ears. I got excellent feedback. One researcher called my presentation ‘more literary than scholarly’ and it made my day.
This was one of those trips where I felt a little haunted by the ghost of my former life. I had a sense of awe at the breadth of individual scholarship and the interdisciplinary, intersectional nature of the discourse. I felt so grateful to myself for having lived my child-free years with so much abandon and audacity, for having solo travelled as much as I did. It means I have no regrets as I foray through these years of co-dependency.
My reverie was interrupted when my partner called to tell me our child had woken up. By then I was happy and excited to spend the rest of the day with them. There’s a reason, I guess, why I now only travel for events that are accommodating of my partner and my child. It’s my way of getting the art world to truly commit to enabling women to have post-partum careers.
My experience in Ljubljana was a reminder of why it is important to explore the world with abandon and audacity. It is only through such explorations that we can truly understand the world and our place in it. I am grateful for the opportunity to have experienced this beautiful city, and I will never forget the moment of solitude I had there.
